TSA’s most uncomfortable screening

What is the most bonkers thing airport security has pulled out of your carry-on bag? 🧳

I think I might be able to top it. 👀

Hear me out.

One time, I was rushing through the airport, trying to catch a flight to a furry convention. I approached airport security and hefted my carry-on luggage onto the conveyor belt, where it trundled along, making its slow way through the scanning device.

Inevitably, my luggage was pulled to the side. 🙄 

“We’re going to have to check your bag,” they told me.

I already knew what they would find, but all I could do was watch as they unzipped my bag, flipped the top open, and gazed upon its contents. 

The mere seconds that passed as they stared at what were just piles and piles of colorful dildos and vibrators—and absolutely nothing else—spun out into an eternity.

Here’s the thing. Though I had already had the for-sale toys shipped to the con, I still had to bring the demo toys with me. And you can’t check luggage that contains items using lithium batteries, which is what we use to ensure our cute little fuckers pack such a big punch in such a small form. Which meant I had to pack them all–with zero packaging–just all floating about freeballing it in my carry-on bag. And because I was running a booth at the con, I needed a couple of units of each of our toys, in a variety of colors. So my bag contained something like FIFTY FUCKERS. 🤯 Yes, 50. Just in one big ol’ pile.

The TSA agent stared at the bag. And stared. And stared. And then zipped it back up without touching anything.

“You’re good to go,” they said.

You bet I am ;)

Has anyone else ever stumbled onto your toy collection? What was their reaction?

And while you might not need 50 fuckers…

… Grab one (or 50!) of these cuties for your carry-on.